Sunday, January 30, 2011

Raising Your Kids by Keeping your Cool

Quote Directly from Book

"Raising Your Kids by Keeping Your Cool by HE Runkel

In Medieval Times the goutlet was a protective glove worn by knights.
When thrown down at the feet of an adversary, the goutlet was an invitation to battle
picking up the goultlet was an acceptance of the invitation,an acceptance of the mutual responsibility of whatever happened next

When kids throw down the goutlet they are testing you to see if you are willing to take responsibility for them.

This book is about being responsible TO THEM for your actions and reactions so you can be a good influence to them and eventually influence them.

Your child is testing you to see if you can be trusted, can you be stable, consistant, Dependable. They need you to pass. Their anxiety wants you to cave but their growing selves wants you to pass.

The momentum of the opponent rather than force is used to change the encounter

It is a model of parenting that chooses not to pick up the Goutlet. It is a model of parenting that teaches to work on your REACTIONS to your children, working on yourself and not your CHILD.

I picked up this book because here on vacation, I release a great amount of control over the boundaries and limit settings that we have at home.

I take time on this school break to make sure I am parenting with proper boundary setting and not with the need to control the situations and therefore the need for control.

I will also be more aware of where I can work on myself and release control
when it is not needed in exchange for influence......

Happy Parenting !
Labels: on parenting

1 comment:

gfcfmom said...

Parenting is so interesting. Thanks for posting on this book. I am going to order it right now. It is interesting about what is structure/what is being controlling. I have tried to not be controlling but recently thought everyone needed more structure so everyone is now getting up getting dressed and making their beds before anything else. I know you are talking more about not reacting to difficult situations with anger and loss of control and it is a little different but I thought I would share. Thanks for posting!