What? Being Alone with Six Children , A husband, A house that has a doorbell ringing non stop, a 65 pound dog, two fish, ?
Its strange how the only memories in the last 15 years I have of being alone, I mean truly alone,are those in the hospital....the nights I was in the recovery unit, after each of my six C-Sections, where the lights stayed on 24 hours, and I would lay there, in the mid hours of the morning/night....alone....well even then I had my newborn angels by my side.....but I was with myself!
Now, in a taxi, leaving Pheonix Airport, heading to the Ranch in Tuscon, I am completely alone and preparing for my days away. I check my blackberry and make sure that all the kids are arriving safely at their god parents houses, between Conneticut and the Hamptons. They all head out seperately, (the four and the six yer old together), They too, will be on their own, without their parents or siblings.
I am once again grateful for the love that is all around me. The most wonderful friends who support this effort and allow me this chance to re charge my batteries and look quietly inward and prepare for the 2010-2011 school year to begin!
I will be thankful all year to them for being there for me!
Everyone needs to take a moement alone, as a busy mom, and redefine how this year is going to be better than the last year. If something is not growing, what is it doing?
My goals here include:
*Redefine my lifes purpose which is to share love with my children and husband, to be grateful for what I have and to contribute to this world. I want to take these postings and publish a book, not a reality show, offer the compasion I have for super mothers and fathers and friends, like you, and share my insights to help motivate people!
*Take the time to understand if my husbands basic needs are being met in our relationship and see what I can do to make sure he feels like he is the most important priority to me....as hard as that sounds with the six priorities we have together!
*Finish all the Bain De Soil Organge Gel SPF #4 tubes I brought with me, do every exercise Class, take every Shamanoc Joourney I can and read every book left unfinished on my Kindle
....before I return home in a week !
%%%%%% The phone rings, I hear screanms, I hear crying, some one does not want to do what the instructions on the board said they "HAD TO DO."
Everyone is really handling their feelings and fears at their own age
appropriate levels. I can not control things completely any longer, I need
them to feel some control,and as I am away, and they are getting ready to leave too (for their godparents houses),it is a safe chance for then to take
control , be responsible, make decisions they can be successful in !
"You dont have to go, I tell the ten year old, to see the Lizards and Snakes Exibit at the Museum of Natural History today if you dont want to, but I hope you choose to go to Times Square tommorow and see the King Tut Exibit?..
I tell them I love them and I promise to bring home a nerf gun for my 4 year old !
and I hang up and begin my day !
Showing posts with label on being a SUPERMOM. Show all posts
Showing posts with label on being a SUPERMOM. Show all posts
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Whats Your Favorite Song ?
I woke up one of my children today at 7:42 am and as I watched the chilcboymanish
face of my 10 year old come alive-----i asked him "Whats Your Favorite Song?"
He rubbed his eyes in wonder of what possibly could be going on.
I am going to declare TODAY IS THE DAY WE FIND OUT YOUR FAVORITE SONG!
What fun we are going to have playing the ipod and discussing music
all day long. What good feelings are we all going to create by making
someone feel we care this much and want to know !
Our family , brothers and sister can all join together and play songs
that THEY like to their brother, and help him find a favorite song !
Lets stop for a moment at that thought.
Its a chance for me to teach a lesson to him as well
A good one! One I want
to teach my children about the Joy of Life, The Feeling of Excitement
about doing something FOR SOMEONE ELSE!
Do something today to bring joy and happiness to you and others
face of my 10 year old come alive-----i asked him "Whats Your Favorite Song?"
He rubbed his eyes in wonder of what possibly could be going on.
I am going to declare TODAY IS THE DAY WE FIND OUT YOUR FAVORITE SONG!
What fun we are going to have playing the ipod and discussing music
all day long. What good feelings are we all going to create by making
someone feel we care this much and want to know !
Our family , brothers and sister can all join together and play songs
that THEY like to their brother, and help him find a favorite song !
Lets stop for a moment at that thought.
Its a chance for me to teach a lesson to him as well
A good one! One I want
to teach my children about the Joy of Life, The Feeling of Excitement
about doing something FOR SOMEONE ELSE!
Do something today to bring joy and happiness to you and others
Saturday, July 31, 2010
On Tennis
I want all my kids to come to the Tennis Court. I want them to all play tennis. Why do I want them to play tennis, because I enjoy it so much, because it makes me feel good to share these feelings of joy with them while we are playing on courts side by side.
It is important to realize that there is something lost in the race to get to the tennis court with every one ready......
I suggest trying the statergy of letting the children make their own choice in wanting to be part of the great ENERGY and LOVE that I feel when I play tennis
that they can share in around me.
I went the other day alone to the tennis court, the ipod was playing in house (so the kids also knew I was not playing tennis with my IPOD and therefore more open to see them!)
I started on my court, and the two courts next to me were empty, instructors wondering if they would be giving a lesson or not.....and then they all came
thru the gates. All happy, all in the best of spirits.
Here,I can truly share Tennis with my children. At the end of this hour we leave
and continue to share the sport together.....I want to play with each of them
as an activity we do together. That is my ultimate goal. To show them there are other relationships that they can have with their mother....that are not caretaker and are not friend, tennis partners.
Ill take that one !
What can you show your child will be a relationship you can share with them
that you can work on together...now ?
It is important to realize that there is something lost in the race to get to the tennis court with every one ready......
I suggest trying the statergy of letting the children make their own choice in wanting to be part of the great ENERGY and LOVE that I feel when I play tennis
that they can share in around me.
I went the other day alone to the tennis court, the ipod was playing in house (so the kids also knew I was not playing tennis with my IPOD and therefore more open to see them!)
I started on my court, and the two courts next to me were empty, instructors wondering if they would be giving a lesson or not.....and then they all came
thru the gates. All happy, all in the best of spirits.
Here,I can truly share Tennis with my children. At the end of this hour we leave
and continue to share the sport together.....I want to play with each of them
as an activity we do together. That is my ultimate goal. To show them there are other relationships that they can have with their mother....that are not caretaker and are not friend, tennis partners.
Ill take that one !
What can you show your child will be a relationship you can share with them
that you can work on together...now ?
Thursday, May 13, 2010
On Listening
Three things we can all do today
to pause a moment just to pray
to be a friend both tried and true
and find some good that we can do
.......William A.Ward
When I read this the first thing that pops into my mind of
"SOME GOOD THAT WE CAN DO" comes listening.
Because to listen is easy. To listen to your friends, to your husband, to your children. To give time for listening, to stay in one place and let people know you are there and ready to listen !
Do not pick up the phone !
Listen to everything everyone has to say today,
tommorow is for something else,
Reacting !!!
Monday, May 3, 2010
on being a Supermom
On being a SUPERMOM
Saturday Morning is just not the same as School Mornings and for those working mothers school and work mornings. Even more the reason to
Enjoy Saturday mornings that much more. Sure I want to be supermom all the time, so when the four year old says, mom, I want to spend time with you, it makes me melt…….but it’s Very Early Saturday morning and I have all day to be a great mom. I
What do you to for yourself on Saturday Mornings? What do you want to do?
*I want to sneak out with the dog……alone……walk to the deli and get a bagged coffee and a buttered roll and sit on the steps of the Museum and feel the morning !
Our children are constantly demanding us to do for them. When you fill yourself up with love and peace and do some of the things you want to do, there is JUST MORE TO GIVE.
Saturday Morning is just not the same as School Mornings and for those working mothers school and work mornings. Even more the reason to
Enjoy Saturday mornings that much more. Sure I want to be supermom all the time, so when the four year old says, mom, I want to spend time with you, it makes me melt…….but it’s Very Early Saturday morning and I have all day to be a great mom. I
What do you to for yourself on Saturday Mornings? What do you want to do?
*I want to sneak out with the dog……alone……walk to the deli and get a bagged coffee and a buttered roll and sit on the steps of the Museum and feel the morning !
Our children are constantly demanding us to do for them. When you fill yourself up with love and peace and do some of the things you want to do, there is JUST MORE TO GIVE.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
On Special Time
Special Time Days.....soon school will be out and will I have organized a Special Time Day with all my children ? These days are hard to plan, but coverage needs to be planned if I am to spend a saturday, a day, alone with one !
MAKE THE PLAN TODAY, to spend a special time day with your child.
and what is it we do?
My special time day with my 10 year old son went something like this:
*We hoped on the bike and went to my favorite cappucino place....Sat outside and
I drank and asked a lot of questions. I found out that my son had his YU GI OH cards
in his pocket. His intention was to teach me how to play....
*A bike ride to the boat house, and two croissants, two seats on the outside metal tables and YU GI OH we played. I was not so good with my atttacks and it seems my son always had another blue eyes white dragon coming from his deck.....
after I lost
*We rented a boat on the boat house and my 10 years old my son completely rowed me to where the turtles hid and back.
Now we captured a moment he will always remember
we would have never planned it so well
the day he rowed mom by himself around the lake
MAKE THE PLAN TODAY, to spend a special time day with your child.
and what is it we do?
My special time day with my 10 year old son went something like this:
*We hoped on the bike and went to my favorite cappucino place....Sat outside and
I drank and asked a lot of questions. I found out that my son had his YU GI OH cards
in his pocket. His intention was to teach me how to play....
*A bike ride to the boat house, and two croissants, two seats on the outside metal tables and YU GI OH we played. I was not so good with my atttacks and it seems my son always had another blue eyes white dragon coming from his deck.....
after I lost
*We rented a boat on the boat house and my 10 years old my son completely rowed me to where the turtles hid and back.
Now we captured a moment he will always remember
we would have never planned it so well
the day he rowed mom by himself around the lake
*It started to drizzle so we rode out of the park and passed a fancy chocolate store. Yes I will buy you a piece, of chocolate, your favorite, before lunch !
*Then home, and he wanted to watch the dvd of Glee episodes because tonight is the airing of the second season.....Well I can get caught of too so I can share this with them ! So Glee it was!
*Lunch in the kitchen and the offer for a board game.
and that was it. Special Time Day!
I took pictures :
-of our bikes infront of our house
-of the BOAT HOUSE SIGN
-of my son rowing the boat
-of the turtles we found on the rocks
-of the blue bird perched on the tree
-of the mommy and daddy ducks we bumped into
-of the sign of the chocolateria
-and of us on the couch watching GLEE
I will download them to shutterfly today, make a 16 page SPECIAL TIME album using full page option and auto fill and wrap it up to give to him next week with a card that will say
"Thanks for sharing a day with me, your the best!"
Be a supermom today!
Sunday, April 11, 2010
on The First Child-One Child
On “One CHILD”
Should I say One child, or the First child? Aren’t they the same? It doesn’t matter how many children you have, you will always have a FIRST CHILD.
All it takes is a glace over to my bookshelf and I see the record book of the every hour feedings I gave my newborn, is it a wonder why he would projectile throw up like an alien across the width of my one bedroom apartment!
As I write these blogs today, I am the same person, I still chart and record everything, I have just done it so many times, in so many areas, that I am trying to share now with other s MORE choices of what to chart and record and create!
Things were always really hard with with my first child, cause they were all new. I hope to share the benefits of doing it SIX times here and help to remind readers that THIS IS THE IMPORTANT PART OF YOUR LIFE !
Be a Supermom Today !
Should I say One child, or the First child? Aren’t they the same? It doesn’t matter how many children you have, you will always have a FIRST CHILD.
All it takes is a glace over to my bookshelf and I see the record book of the every hour feedings I gave my newborn, is it a wonder why he would projectile throw up like an alien across the width of my one bedroom apartment!
As I write these blogs today, I am the same person, I still chart and record everything, I have just done it so many times, in so many areas, that I am trying to share now with other s MORE choices of what to chart and record and create!
Things were always really hard with with my first child, cause they were all new. I hope to share the benefits of doing it SIX times here and help to remind readers that THIS IS THE IMPORTANT PART OF YOUR LIFE !
Be a Supermom Today !
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Be a Supermom Today
Good Morning
Its Saturday ….Three children woke up in my bed about 7:00am and for some reason
They did not wake me up…..Maybe they tried, I don’t actually remember.
As I sit here at my computer, all dressed and showered with the sounds of all my children echoing throughout the house.
I want to just run down and start the day, but what if I see my daughter pouring endless amount of chocolate into her milk, or what if I see my thirteen year old still wearing his shirt from school yesterday… what kind of day will I start?
So before I jump in…….I set my mind , (or intention) on what kind of mom I want to be today, how I want to be with my children, so no matter what my responses are they don’t mold my day or change based upon my children’s circumstances or action of the moment.
I am going to smile, kiss everyone, and make my coffee! I will make a comment to one at a time, making sure I make eye contact.
Be a SUPERMOM TODAY
Its Saturday ….Three children woke up in my bed about 7:00am and for some reason
They did not wake me up…..Maybe they tried, I don’t actually remember.
As I sit here at my computer, all dressed and showered with the sounds of all my children echoing throughout the house.
I want to just run down and start the day, but what if I see my daughter pouring endless amount of chocolate into her milk, or what if I see my thirteen year old still wearing his shirt from school yesterday… what kind of day will I start?
So before I jump in…….I set my mind , (or intention) on what kind of mom I want to be today, how I want to be with my children, so no matter what my responses are they don’t mold my day or change based upon my children’s circumstances or action of the moment.
I am going to smile, kiss everyone, and make my coffee! I will make a comment to one at a time, making sure I make eye contact.
Be a SUPERMOM TODAY
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
What Dreams are made of
Just the other day, when four of my children were on their computers for four hours straight and the two younger ones were glued to the TV.
What was I doing?
I was feeling frustrated.
"What should we be doing? "They Said !
I told them the stories of me and their father, when we were young,what we used to do. I explained to them that when they win a game, reach a certain level, its ok to stop. Its ok to
enjoy their victory and let there be room for another activity to ENTER.
When you roam around a room with endless activities to create you create them. But you
dont get the chance if you are infront of a screen ! You cant see !
I also explained that unless they can better manage their computer,screen, video game usage I will have to manage it for them with a sign in chart and sign out chart ! I further told them I really dont want to do this. I dont want to be in that position.
THE NEXT MORNING..... had to be what dreams are made of;
It was the most beautiful day, and as I rode my double bike, with the 4 year old and his helmut on the back peddling, my six year old on her shiny training wheels, and the four older boys
infront.
They recruited other kids from the park, and some friends showed up to meet up and we spend the day with ice-cream, making bird nests and playing football on a great field !
I made sure to NOT MENTION anything about the computers, but to tell them how wonderful they were for everything they were doing...
"I forgot how amazing you ride your bike"
"I trust you so much in the city the way you stop infront of the curb"
"You are going to be an amazing adult able to get people involved in what you are doing ."
"You always do much a great job getting drinks for everyone."
Be a supermom today!
What was I doing?
I was feeling frustrated.
"What should we be doing? "They Said !
I told them the stories of me and their father, when we were young,what we used to do. I explained to them that when they win a game, reach a certain level, its ok to stop. Its ok to
enjoy their victory and let there be room for another activity to ENTER.
When you roam around a room with endless activities to create you create them. But you
dont get the chance if you are infront of a screen ! You cant see !
I also explained that unless they can better manage their computer,screen, video game usage I will have to manage it for them with a sign in chart and sign out chart ! I further told them I really dont want to do this. I dont want to be in that position.
THE NEXT MORNING..... had to be what dreams are made of;
It was the most beautiful day, and as I rode my double bike, with the 4 year old and his helmut on the back peddling, my six year old on her shiny training wheels, and the four older boys
infront.
They recruited other kids from the park, and some friends showed up to meet up and we spend the day with ice-cream, making bird nests and playing football on a great field !
I made sure to NOT MENTION anything about the computers, but to tell them how wonderful they were for everything they were doing...
"I forgot how amazing you ride your bike"
"I trust you so much in the city the way you stop infront of the curb"
"You are going to be an amazing adult able to get people involved in what you are doing ."
"You always do much a great job getting drinks for everyone."
Be a supermom today!
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
On being a SUPERMOM
Raising Six children in truly amazing.
I walk into the one room all six are sleeping and I touch their foreheads
with my lips and offer a blessing, a wish, a promise.
I step outside and the sun greets me as it penetrates its heat and light
straight into my heart......and I glow.
I am so filled up with lov that I can glow !
-knowing that my husband will be in my arms any day now
-knowing the joy I am going to feel skiing down the mountain with five
of my children, all crossing across the same path, all at different stages,
all will reach the chair lift......and ill ride up with them.....and we will do it again.
-knowing at the end of the day I will be exhausted and not feeling as I do now.
So the question is How to be a Supermom!
Transfer the incredible feelings, find the incredible feelings and practice every day,
practice making them last !
This is what your children will feell. This is when you are in your best place to be
an influence....because one day that is all you can be !
Walk outside, take a deep breath, take a Grand Stretch.....and have a wonderful day !
I walk into the one room all six are sleeping and I touch their foreheads
with my lips and offer a blessing, a wish, a promise.
I step outside and the sun greets me as it penetrates its heat and light
straight into my heart......and I glow.
I am so filled up with lov that I can glow !
-knowing that my husband will be in my arms any day now
-knowing the joy I am going to feel skiing down the mountain with five
of my children, all crossing across the same path, all at different stages,
all will reach the chair lift......and ill ride up with them.....and we will do it again.
-knowing at the end of the day I will be exhausted and not feeling as I do now.
So the question is How to be a Supermom!
Transfer the incredible feelings, find the incredible feelings and practice every day,
practice making them last !
This is what your children will feell. This is when you are in your best place to be
an influence....because one day that is all you can be !
Walk outside, take a deep breath, take a Grand Stretch.....and have a wonderful day !
Monday, March 22, 2010
on LETTING THINGS BE
Its a weekend, your on Holiday, there are so many things to do in the CITY. Your on SPRING BREAK and your expecting a day at the beach, getting out onto the mountain .....
But there really isnt any structured plans. There is no ski school, no birthday parties, no sports, no school.....
As you walk around your house you see your children partaking in activities that you imagine they would always enjoy.
For me, thats seeing my 13 and 12 year old, in a bedroom, on seperate beds, scanning through the news, their emails and having a conversation with eachother.
For me, thats seeing the 10 year old and the 8 year old playing a card game with chips....and fantisicing when they actually play with all their brothers after dinner.
For me, that watching the 6 year old and the 4 year old at the breakfast table eating their breakfast , fruits, while we slow bake the milk
for the hot chocolates,tiny marshmellows and oreo straws !
and yes........Five sets of skis and one snowboard are lined up for us to ski together as a family today, the four year old on the magic carpet at the base of the mountain while the six year old, eight year old, ten year old, twelve year old and thirteen year old ski with me on all the blues and blacks of Bachelors Gulch Mountain here in Colorado on our Spring Break.
As I write this post, I know this is an important moment in Parenting..... to just let everyone be
But there really isnt any structured plans. There is no ski school, no birthday parties, no sports, no school.....
As you walk around your house you see your children partaking in activities that you imagine they would always enjoy.
For me, thats seeing my 13 and 12 year old, in a bedroom, on seperate beds, scanning through the news, their emails and having a conversation with eachother.
For me, thats seeing the 10 year old and the 8 year old playing a card game with chips....and fantisicing when they actually play with all their brothers after dinner.
For me, that watching the 6 year old and the 4 year old at the breakfast table eating their breakfast , fruits, while we slow bake the milk
for the hot chocolates,tiny marshmellows and oreo straws !
and yes........Five sets of skis and one snowboard are lined up for us to ski together as a family today, the four year old on the magic carpet at the base of the mountain while the six year old, eight year old, ten year old, twelve year old and thirteen year old ski with me on all the blues and blacks of Bachelors Gulch Mountain here in Colorado on our Spring Break.
As I write this post, I know this is an important moment in Parenting..... to just let everyone be
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
BE A SUPER MOM TODAY
I have come to understand that I have not come forth as a mother or wife to get everyone to follow the truth which I think is the truth.
I have not come forth to encourage my children into a world of conformity or sameness.
I understand that in conformity there is not the diversity that
Stimulates creativity.
And that in focusing on bringing about conformatity I am pointing to
An ending and not a continuing. ^
I went to a book club where Deborah M. Roffman, author, offered a handout which I would like to share with you here:
“Nurturing is a Five Piece Suit” (in part)
1. Affirmations
Understanding and honoring your child’s unique developmental stage and providing UNCONDITIONAL LOVE for who the child is
2. INFORMATION
Providing alternative points of view and promoting critical thinking
3. CLARITY ABOUT VALUES
Naming the values you want your children to value; SPEAKING MORE about values then rules.
4. LIMIT SETTING
Making sure clear and age appropriate boundaries are firmly in place and being prepared to negotiate limits when appropriate as children mature
5. ANTICIPATORY GUIDANCE
Helping children anticipate WHAT IFS; helping them walk through
In advance situations they may face
Turning children gradually over to themselves
^Ester and Jerry Hicks the Law of Attraction
I have not come forth to encourage my children into a world of conformity or sameness.
I understand that in conformity there is not the diversity that
Stimulates creativity.
And that in focusing on bringing about conformatity I am pointing to
An ending and not a continuing. ^
I went to a book club where Deborah M. Roffman, author, offered a handout which I would like to share with you here:
“Nurturing is a Five Piece Suit” (in part)
1. Affirmations
Understanding and honoring your child’s unique developmental stage and providing UNCONDITIONAL LOVE for who the child is
2. INFORMATION
Providing alternative points of view and promoting critical thinking
3. CLARITY ABOUT VALUES
Naming the values you want your children to value; SPEAKING MORE about values then rules.
4. LIMIT SETTING
Making sure clear and age appropriate boundaries are firmly in place and being prepared to negotiate limits when appropriate as children mature
5. ANTICIPATORY GUIDANCE
Helping children anticipate WHAT IFS; helping them walk through
In advance situations they may face
Turning children gradually over to themselves
^Ester and Jerry Hicks the Law of Attraction
Friday, February 12, 2010
RESPOND not REACT
Do you respond to the situations that come up every day in caring for your child or do you react
To them.
As I lay here on a sled, in the park, central park, the most amazing park in the world Iknow I am so lucky to have so many chances to get it right!
Watching my youngest child explore the snow I give him spaceSpace he needs to feel the sun andCreate....just as I am doing at the same time now creating my blog, my book!
My dog running around us freely until someone kindly expressed their children are scared of the dog...I immediately leash him and give a thumbs up!And I know how lucky I am to have this opportunity in my life to be a positive life giving force andto respond to the needs of six children and use the resources in one of the best cities in the world!
Responding or reacting is one of the most important struggles I want to remain in my life because I want to remain aware that there is a difference.Just the other day I was guiltily of reacting to a situation in a way that was impulsive.I can't take back my reaction but I still have a chance to respond.This example can apply to any mother with any number of situations raising any age child.At night, when I get my last chance of the day, when I say goodnight I will apologize for reacting and ask"How should I feel when you do that?”
There are several child rearing books that I have read recently, two which highlight the RESONDING vs REACTING approach ; “How to Hug a Porcupine” by Julia A. Ross, and “Parent Teen Breakthrough by Kirshenbaum and Foster.
In both these books there are great suggestions on how to ask questions that build bridges instead of walls. Reading these books helps give one the tools that they might need to respond better in situations instead of reacting to them:
Page 63 of Parent/Teen Breakthrough presents the following guidelines:
Your child insists on doing something you don’t approve of: DON’T REACT, RESPOND
“Why is this so important to you?”
Your child acts in a way that makes no sense to you:
“How do you want me to think about what you are doing?
Your child completely shuts you out: DON’T REACT and GET MAD, RESPOND AND ASK
“What can I do to help you?
Remember, responding and not reacting offers unconditional love when your child needs it most!Try today to respond to one thing differently and tell me how it feels !
To them.
As I lay here on a sled, in the park, central park, the most amazing park in the world Iknow I am so lucky to have so many chances to get it right!
Watching my youngest child explore the snow I give him spaceSpace he needs to feel the sun andCreate....just as I am doing at the same time now creating my blog, my book!
My dog running around us freely until someone kindly expressed their children are scared of the dog...I immediately leash him and give a thumbs up!And I know how lucky I am to have this opportunity in my life to be a positive life giving force andto respond to the needs of six children and use the resources in one of the best cities in the world!
Responding or reacting is one of the most important struggles I want to remain in my life because I want to remain aware that there is a difference.Just the other day I was guiltily of reacting to a situation in a way that was impulsive.I can't take back my reaction but I still have a chance to respond.This example can apply to any mother with any number of situations raising any age child.At night, when I get my last chance of the day, when I say goodnight I will apologize for reacting and ask"How should I feel when you do that?”
There are several child rearing books that I have read recently, two which highlight the RESONDING vs REACTING approach ; “How to Hug a Porcupine” by Julia A. Ross, and “Parent Teen Breakthrough by Kirshenbaum and Foster.
In both these books there are great suggestions on how to ask questions that build bridges instead of walls. Reading these books helps give one the tools that they might need to respond better in situations instead of reacting to them:
Page 63 of Parent/Teen Breakthrough presents the following guidelines:
Your child insists on doing something you don’t approve of: DON’T REACT, RESPOND
“Why is this so important to you?”
Your child acts in a way that makes no sense to you:
“How do you want me to think about what you are doing?
Your child completely shuts you out: DON’T REACT and GET MAD, RESPOND AND ASK
“What can I do to help you?
Remember, responding and not reacting offers unconditional love when your child needs it most!Try today to respond to one thing differently and tell me how it feels !
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)